X-Ray Vision

First off I’d like to say thanks to What Would Batman Do for the nice shout out today. Now that I’ve gotten the pleasantries out of the way it’s time to get on to today’s topic! The various ways Superman has used his x-ray vision! Seeing as this blog is named after that particular power we might as well take a look at how handy it is.

He has used it to be a dentist. Yes, Superman has super-dentistry powers.

He has used it to discover secret identities. That is kind of a dick move Superman.

He has used it to discover criminals for Batman to beat up. You are a lazy hero Superman.

He has watched a gorilla use it to melt a safe.

Wait, what? I will admit that I am simply a marine biologist, not a primatologist or astrophysicist, but I am fairly certain that is not how x-ray vision works. Melting through something to see what’s on the other side kind of negates the whole stealth advantage that x-ray vision is supposed to give you. I’d like you to imagine the previous examples of x-ray vision as if the x-ray vision worked by melting everything.

Yes, it changes those scenarios quite a bit. Jimmy’s face is melted, there is a super hero melee revealing Superman’s secret identity, and Batman will show up to see a man running around because his pants are on fire. The only constant is that Superman remains a lazy jerk. Other than that the panels just got a whole lot funnier.

And thus I end my scientific analysis of Superman’s x-ray vision. It can melt things, and turns Superman into a jerk. Best power ever.

-        Gonzo

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